July 18, 2016|
It's hard to describe. Bad things just happen when you don't have a room to sleep in. Or a shower. I got a message from work saying my flaky coworker skipped out again. Asking if I can come in. I actually am glad not for money reasons but just so I have something to do. At the same time I had to go to the bathroom so badly and just was frenzied trying to get my shit together, pouring the piss out of the cups, I didn't even use a drain. Just into the backyard. Then my iPad comes crashing onto my foot. I'm barefoot for some reason. And I'm outside and it's wet. And it hurts.
I thought my foot was fine until I put on socks and realized I'm bleeding. I thought my iPad was fine until I looked at it after using the bathroom and realized it cracked when it landed face down on the pavement.
None of this is fine
It all seems doable until it happens
Then you realize all this bullshit that wouldn't happen otherwise
I'll have to tell him I have some tasks I need to run this morning
I so badly need a shower
A lack of self worth
A feeling of not belonging