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August 02, 2016

Spent two days fucking in a motel room then returned to a club acting like I'm single. Doesn't feel right but neither does being totally invested in someone who doesn't want to have that going both ways. I'm interested in other women but I think I feel like a slime all the time and pursuing them requires maybe more wherewithal than I have

My mom blocked the driveway so I have nowhere to sleep with any privacy. I just called her and she's moving her car but I freaked out and kicked her license plate and I got contaminated and rubbed rubbing alcohol all over my clothes and threw things. All at 2am.

I just want my life of fucking the girl
Of playing fallout in bed with her
Of playing broforce when we want to play together

I don't know

How to get that

It's so hard to survive out here. For people without ocd. For people with ocd



I'll sleep with my car windows open. So I can stop inhaling rubbing alcohol.