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October 26, 2016

Things get to me more than I'd like. My mom is willing to rent my room back out to me for more than I'm willing to pay. But she already found someone. The point is moot. I could stay in the meantime though. For a price again.

I think that probably gets to me too

She talked about giving me a second chance
Everything that's happened is my fault. My failure. That's how she sees it. That hurts me. I think. But it's hard to tell. I've built such high walls around myself.

I wish the prescription would come in.

A man pissing on a wall told me he'd beat the shit out of me and that he fucked my mother. But at the end of the day and into the next, I just kept thinking about the mother who talked condescendingly to me like I was her personal servant.

Been thinking about the girl more. I don't think she thinks about me.

And I wish my prescription would come in.