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September 11, 2010

Driving home feels foreign to me. It is a different place now. Drove by where it all went down for the first time. Different landscape. Feeling of dread whenever I drive home. Hole in my heart. I don't know why. It doesn't seem like it should feel that different, just some changed exits. But I often miss what's obvious. Was in an arcade at school recently trying to be calm, but felt myself growing more nervous. I didn't feel like the game sounds were annoying me, but they were having an averse effect on me. I guess this thing goes deeper than is outwardly apparent.

went to planetarium alone and then a punk show. was going to leave show at one point but then my new friend ran up to me and she's the best and her boyfriend is the best and they're great