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May 25, 2009

Last night turned out pretty lame. Was planning on going to this Marilyn Manson release thing at some SF club/bar, and I asked a friend if she'd like to go. She said she couldn't drive because she needed to save some money. I told her I'd be showing up a few hours early to make sure that I get the �free prize�, but since it was on Haight, we could entertain ourselves in some way.

The thing about this friend is that she's freaked out on me before, for really stupid things. Once she got mad because I didn't call to remind her that some event was on that date, so she completely forgot, and got upset when she finally got in contact with me at the last minute and found out I didn't have room in my car anymore. Another time she got upset because, even though I had emailed everyone on my Facebook list a week before an event, I didn't call her the day before to remind her.

I figured we could leave those events in the past, but no way, NO WAY.

So, that afternoon, she calls me and she needs to find someone to get their signature, and she sounds all stressed out like usual, which is annoying. And she is wondering if maybe we could meet up or if I could get her thirty minutes prior to the event. Eventually I decided that I would just head out to SF, and call her after I get gas, so that if she�s able to go with me, she could, but otherwise we could meet up there or she could just not go I guess, if gas is really that much of a problem.

She was talking about leaving at 8:30 when the event was at 9:00. I was planning on getting her at 6, but figured I could stretch it to 7, but then she said she was about ready to go when I called her at 5:45, so whatever. I wasn�t even rushing her, told her to take her time since we have a lot of time!

On our way there, she talked about how she was hungry, but I figured we could eat there, so whatever, but then she seemed to get increasingly agitated, all hungering for McDonald's, asking if we could just go through a drive-through. I was hungry, too, but jeeze, wait 15 minutes. It would be lame anyway because I wouldn't be able to eat, I'd just be driving while she sits and shoves food down her gullet. So we walked around Haight for a bit, found some food, I ate MEXICAN, and she went to a pizza place and brought it over to the MEXICAN place, and when she finished her pizza, she told me to hurry up so she could find a crepe place. I told her I didn't bother her while she was eating, but she kept saying to hurry up anyway.

So she was cold and miserable and went into Walgreen's to warm up, and I was there, and I kept checking on the club, and eventually I left Walgreen�s because I couldn�t stand the fluorescent lighting, and I mistakenly thought the club was open, but when she saw it wasn�t, she expressed her disappointment and annoyance because she totally could have run that errand and we could have totally left much later than I wanted to since the place wasn�t even open, essentially saying I could have compromised my mission so that she could fulfill hers while still saving gas.

I didn�t even know what happened with her errand, but I think she compromised hers, and so was upset with me for not compromising on my plans, which I can understand to an extent, TO AN EXTENT. I don�t think it�s cool to bitch at me, though, because I wouldn�t start rearranging things so that she could run her task, especially since we are both adults with cars. What�s really weird is that the place where she had to run the errand was in SF, so she ended up driving there, then back home, despite the gas thing. I don�t know what her plan was. To drive out there a second time?

So on our way to my car to wait, she kept saying how inconsiderate I am, how I�m supposed to be able to accurately predict how popular these events will be/how the fans are, and I pointed out how rude it was to rush me along while I was eating and how things didn�t have to be arranged in this way and she didn�t even have to come.

Usually I think of that as being a bad argument, like Max Hardcore saying to girls that they aren�t forced to be degraded, but I wasn�t pissing on her or cumming on her eye, so I think it�s a cogent argument. It was an event I had a specific time table for, and then she was too big for that time table, but I wasn�t planning on altering that time table. Is that reasonable? I suppose it would be a nice thing to alter plans for people, but my ability to alter my schedule has limits. I like showing up for places insanely early because I get stressed about time and because I know how to entertain myself in those time periods, and she was on the other extreme, where there would be no early arrival whatsoever.

So eventually she told me to shut up in my passenger seat, and I told her to remember to lock the door if she leaves, and I went to the club, where I got my free prize, and they were playing Manson, and I was kind of at a loss at what to do. It was the kind of event that is for friends, kind of boring if you�re alone, so after blowing up people�s phones so I could blow some steam. I wanted to find out what else was going on in the city or if someone would like to come out to hang out there, but I had the girl issue, where I knew she wanted to go home early, and I didn�t really know what to do with her, because I couldn�t go anywhere while she was around, and I couldn�t call anyone over because I might have to leave at some point. A lightbulb went off and, I just decided it would be best to cut my losses, drive her home, and if I thought it�d be worthwhile to drive back to the city, I would. Normally I don�t like using gas so frivolously, but the cost of having her there was more than the price. Pleased as punch, I marched over to the car, unlocked it with my electric key, and she jumped and gasped, I guess because she is a pussy and did not expect me. Then she walked out, slammed the door, and walked down the street. �Do you have a ride? I was going to drive you home.� That is what I said to her, but she just angrily marched down the street. Whatever. I was glad and relieved to have her gone, and then I saw some poor sucker pick her up, so that was even more of a relief, because I didn�t have to worry about her bothering me later. She left one of the sodas I gave her precariously perched in my car, so I was glad it didn�t spill, and I went back to the club, and just enjoyed being freed of the bothersome wart.

There were some cute Manson fan ladies, but i DIDN�T TALK TO them because ladies scare me, but I did talk to this guy about music, particularly Romantic music and its relationship to contemporary music because I had just read an article that day about that very thing, and it intrigued me, but he did this weird fucking thing where he took some of what I said and endlessly mentioned it along with other points of discussions. Skeletons, microprocessors, Classical (classical what? I do not know), 100 AD. I was pretty tired of him after a while especially since he spit constantly while he spoke and had no respect for the climaxes of songs so when I�d start getting into a song, he�d start rambling, and I�d have to run to the bathroom to wash his DISEEEEEEEEEEASES off of me. At one point I think Cristina left a message for me, but I couldn�t understand her, so I deleted it after listening to it once because I didn�t want to deal with it.

I stuck around there until 11, just waiting for some people to dance, so I could dance, but no one danced. And then I found that a bunch of my CDs went missing, but fortunately they were all CD-Rs, and earlier I had moved the CD case my friend in a band gave me to another spot in the car. So I was glad that it wasn�t taken by the rhino.

That other friend i think is great, but we�ve still had weird fights, and she still has some exbf shit going on, and she is very affectionate to me and says very hot things, and so it can be confusing so i have to protect myself so she can�t hurt me by making me feel like we are a thing when it is really he who she fucks and I who she says these things to. So anyway, she might be evil, whatever, but she is nice and feeds me food, and gives me massages and lets me chew her arm, and she gave me that CD. And she is educated and provides decent conversation, and she gave me that CD, and it would be infuriating if this fat rhino came along and stole/threw it away, so I�m glad i moved it, because it would be like seeing a beautiful thing degraded by an ugly thing.

So, I wanna see some good friends, I wanna see friends who don�t do these things, but I ended up feeling very alone last night since so many people didnt pick up. Didn�t feel bad for losing a friend, don�t really care, but wanted to talk to some others.